This one’s for the guys; for the guys who get hit with the dreaded fake orgasm. While some men do sometimes fake it, women do it far more often, for various reasons. So, listen up, fellas!
Orgasms are the things that horror movies are made of. Well, kind of. I’ve come to believe that many of the contortions and scary faces of bone-chilling movies are inspired by the big O. With that said, it’s possible, but not easy, to fake the loss of control experienced during a great orgasm.
Of course, the last thing you want is to think that your lover has merely been playing the part, and in her mind the words ‘and, scene’ are rolling around, as she congratulates herself on an oscar-worthy performance. Most likely, if she’s faking it, it’s not like that.
Sure, maybe she’s just not that into you… er… your sexual ability, or lack thereof. However, fake orgasms don’t necessarily mean you’re a poor performer. Now, if your girlfriend or wife starts giving you suggestions, or tips, after sex, then you just might be 100% of the problem, and you will definitely want to follow those suggestions. While this isn’t intended to be a ‘how to’ for men to ensure an orgasm on their mate’s end, I will give you guys a few tips.
One major issue for men is not understanding that the average woman doesn’t turn on like a light switch. MOST WOMEN NEED FOREPLAY! Take a few minutes to warm her up.
Pay attention! She might give certain subtle, or not-so-subtle, indications that she wants you to hold it steady. You might the ‘keep it right there’ touch or squeeze. Whatever the queue is, which varies with each woman, you can figure it out if you just… keep it right there, keep that particular action going, and see what happens.
Silence doesn’t necessarily mean boredom. Sometimes, the quiet is right before the storm. If she makes no sound at all, or goes from moaning to silent, don’t assume the worst.
Men are easy, or easier anyway. Most men are guaranteed to have at least one orgasm during sex. Women, well, we have a lot more going on physically, plus the fact that performance anxiety and poor body image are real problems for many women. Imagine trying to relax and get fully into it, to be able to have an orgasm, and all you can think about is whether or not you look fat, odd, awkward, … Not happening.
Women also have more fickle hormones. If your wife or girlfriend is depressed, stressed, recently had a baby, or has a hormonal health problem, then hormones can be causing low libido. If she isn’t much interested in sex from the start, that’s even more of an indication. Don’t automatically take this personally. Pay attention to her, talk to her, and find out what’s going on. She may need healing from something, and you will need to give her the understanding and time to do that. She’ll appreciate it, and it can actually enhance your relationship in other ways.
So, with all that said, the bottom line is, it’s complicated, but if you want to try to figure out if she’s faking or not, check the face, Bro! Notice the body movements and sounds. If it looks like your woman is about to levitate or hurl green goo across the room, at any moment (complete with convulsions and eyes bucked or rolled back), if she sounds like she’s speaking in tongues or trying to call on a demon from the pits of hell, if it’s almost enough to make you think you might need to call a priest, keep doing whatever you’re doing, because you might be about to witness the real deal!
Healthy relationships are part of a healthy lifestyle! You deserve to be mo better!